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Topic Title: How to learn to cope with pain?
Created On: 12/09/2004 12:37 PM
 
 07/01/2008 11:44 AM

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lud05

Hey everyone- I feel the same way.
I had my first operation at 16, second at 22. I am 24 and I have no cartilage left in my right knee. Doc said there is nothing he can do until i have a knee replacement (not for another 10 or so yrs). It hurts to walk up stairs and do normal things like taking a walk. I am very active, and it has really stopped me from being so. I was told I can't run, take walks, swim, etc. It is very frustrating, but everyone, HANG IN THERE!
 12/11/2005 07:57 PM

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TaraSauvage

Hi, I totally understand about the depression. I got knee pain after having a major gut surgery ruptured appendix and infection and I lost about 15 lbs in a few weeks and my legs muscles went down really fast and I was on levaquin for antibitics which causes also tendonitis. Anyways a few weeks after my recovery I noticed a weird feeling in my right knee like it was unstable - I went to a well know orthapedic doctor in LA, and he sent me in for an MRI which said I had early chondramalacia patella, and sent me to a few months of physical therapy - the pain was not too bad, but it did not get any better, then the left knee started to ache, so I switched to another doctor who is famous for knee surgery and did some surgery on my friends, he took me more serious and did a thorough investigation and said I had pateller tondonitis in BOTH knees so I switched to a different physical thereaphist. Now after 5 and ahalf month of PT the condition is just aggravated, it hurts, more now and I am depressed and grouchy when I get the knee pain. At one point I thought my husband would leave me becasue I have changed a lot - I cryed a lot at first because I was so freaked out from the pain I thought I would have to eventually go in a wheelchair. I went to a therapist who said I had post traumatic stress disorder from my surgery and the knee pain, so I stopped working at my job because I could not handle the pain/stress of doing a travelling sales job, just lugging stuff through the airport would leave my knee in pain and I would cry on the airplane ride home. Now I am on disability for PTSD and I stay home, go to PT, and try to keep my chin up. I must say its been very challenging. I have been married 5 years and alot of people are asking me when I am going to have children. However I am so freaked out abotu what I have going on, I cannot imagine dealing with being pregnant right now. I go through periods of depression, my fears are that I wont be able to walk or my fear is the fear of more pain than I already have. I hate pain in the night. It wakes me up. A recent MRi last week showed nothing wrong but there is still pain, so I do the ice and I do the exercises, but it still persists. If anyone has any advice that would be great. I am 34 year old female. For those of you suffering from depression, I suggest therapy and focus on your religion, because pain just brought me closer to God, although it causes me anxiety and fear also. Its strange what pain can do to someone who had 33 years of being pain free and very active.
 10/19/2005 09:49 AM

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ashayna

Well im right there with you all. Iv had a recon, wen i was 14, n now i need another coz it just didnt heal properly, which sucks the most coz i did nothing wrong! Wen i found out, i thought my life was over. Now im being told that ill never play state netball again, so there goes a whole 14 yrs of dreams n aspirations down the drain! i get so much pain, its not funny, but i guess it worked in the opposite way to you, Sadepisara, iv learnt to just put up wityh it, and because its so constant, i can just ignore it. Iv tried pain killers, ive tried building up muscles, iv tried punching walls, but all that left me with was a broken wrist! Good luck with yours coz i no tyhat i have at least another 1.5 yrs of extreme pain!!
 10/06/2005 01:48 PM

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canderso2099

cripc :

I feel the same. I took one fall and now my shoulder is separated for life.
 09/21/2005 05:08 AM

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cripc

hey i feel your pain thats where im at too after acl mcl and maniscus 75 percent cartiledge gone!
 06/04/2005 04:26 PM

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nokturnopr

WELL, U KNOW, IT'S FUNNY THAT U SAY THAT, IN MY CASE, I'M A EX DANCER ...YEP, ONE KNEE DISLOCATION AND THE OTHER ONE WITH DESTROYED MENISCUS...HOW DOES THAT SUCK, CAN'T DANCE, CAN'T RUN, CAN'T EVEN WALK OR SLEEP WITHOUT PAIN....ONE TIME SOMEONE TOLD ME, "REMEMBER IT COULD BE WORSE", AND I SAID, HOW DOES THAT HELP ME?? THIS IS BAD ENOUGH FOR ME AND THE FACT THAT SOMEONE ELSE HAS MORE PROBLEMS DOESN'T HELP ME AT ALL, WHY SHOULD I ACCEPT IT??
 01/13/2005 07:09 PM

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jrmillar

Hi, Sorry to hear your feeling so down. Sounds like your head hurts more than your knees. I'll tell a wee story and you tell me if you still feel down. I injured my knee 10 years ago and was told that I was never going to play rugby again. I was in the Army, 23 years old and on the verge of signing a pro contract with a club. For me it was the end of the world and no matter what any one said to me it was the worst thing that could happen to any one. I went to the South of England to do rehab for my knee. The place was Headley Court. Basically, in the forces, if you were injured you went there. I was still very angry, still very depressed. On my first morning I met a lad called Jason. He had to have been the happiest person I had/have ever met. So happy it was nearly rediculous. I tried to strike up a conversation with him, managed, but it was very difficult as I couldnt understand him. As I got to know him I learnt to understand what he was saying (very strange accent) and we became great friends. Jason was on exercise in the Army and was leading a tank through a wood at night. He twisted his ankle, fell and had his head run over by a 34 tonne vehicle. Thankfully the ground was extremely soft but not soft enough. He suffered severe brain damage, his children were scared of him and his marriage broke down. Incidentally, he also died 3 years after I met him due to complications. I have never felt angry or depressed since. I have a dodgy knee and can't play rugby again. I also have a loving wife, beautiful daughter and the rest of my life ahead of me. I know from experience that it feels as if it only happened to you but there are so many people who are much worse off than ourselves. Good luck Tony
 12/09/2004 12:37 PM

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Sadepisara

Hi! My deepest sympathies for all you who struggle with knee pains. There is many of us, but every individual still goes through their pain alone. My knees were just fine, until I turned 16 and started having symptoms. First one was operated when I was 18, the other when I was 19. When I turned 24, they were both operated at once. Scar tissue (plicas) were removed at every time of surgery. Recovery from the lates surgery (it took place in April 2004) was fine, until I started having short periods of pain in August 2004. It would pass, but in the latest case, it didn't. Now my knees have been hurting like hell for the past 6 weeks with no end in sight. The pain is intense, grating and grinding. At every step. Especially when I sit (I work with computers, sitting in office daily for hours) for long times at once. I went to see an orthopaedist. I was diagnosed with Chondromalacia Patellae. Term that I have never heard before until now. She really did not say much, I got the name of the syndrome only afterwards when I asked some short summary of my case (I like to keep tabs of what doctors have said) via email. I searched information of my case from internet and found out quite a bit. Wonder why doctors never explain things enough. They must know that patients always are afraid to ask as much as they would like. People might feel the need to act like a good patient, be correct and polite and not ask too much. I do this almost every time and always regret afterwards. But I cannot help it either. Therefore I try asking doctors some things by email afterwards. The pain is bad. Doctor only said that if it's any better, my case is pretty common. Then I was told to strengthen my thigh muscles, which could help. I find it very difficult to do anything exercise-like at all, because of the unimaginable amount of pain I experience when trying to do the exercises. Sometimes I honestly do not know what to do to cope with the pain. It's seriously affecting my social life, due to the fact that it's difficult, if not impossible, for the people near me to understand what I am going through. My knee-issues are a story so old that no one takes them seriously anymore. And I was better for some years in between the surgeries. Just not anymore. Only my mother knows how deeply depressed I am sometimes. And even she didn't quite believe me until recently. People find it impossibly difficult to believe that there is pain, to which nothing helps. No pain killers, no rest, no nothing. Nothing helps right now. The most difficult thing is to see a friend's face when you tell then something actually serious and important, like the fact that your pain affects you not only physically, but mentally as well. That is scary. For the others, too. They try to understadn, but cannot. Almost easier feels not to discuss with them, as they cannot know how it feels themselves. To genuinely understand pain, you have to be in it yourself. I try to watch the way I'm sitting, but as being a very short person, sometimes sitting with other leg bent beneath me is the only way to get some support or comfort when sitting in meetings at work etc. I know I'm not doign the exercises as much I should, but I just cannot take the pain! Too many years with pain have left me with very short tolerance of pain or ache. I know I could get help, like going to a therapist or something to learn cope with pain, but in my country (I live in Europe), it's not that easy to get mental help. Therapy is still a big taboo, though the year is 2004. And how to pay for it? I'm still paying for the surgery that was in April (took a loan for it). I don't have that kinda money right now. No one in my family has money that big, so I cannot ask anyone to help either. It has to be on me. I've never been in therapy before, so that also frightens me a bit. What if I do get myself to go to some therapist and he/she is just not the right for me? Sometimes people's chemistries just don't match, which makes the patient feel even more alone in their problems. Hope someone had the nerves to read this through. If you managed, I humbly thank you. Nothing makes you feel better than the fact, that someone took the time to listen you. Read what you have to say. I thank you. And please share your experiences of how to live with pain! Any advice is helpful. Best luck to all of you with your pain!

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